I love this scene in Bug’s Life where Flick uses a ‘prop’ (a rock) to describe a concept (seed growing into a tree), but his student (Dot) doesn’t get him. I live this regularly when I share new ideas with my best friend, leadership student, and wife of 16 years, Chris. After I share a thought and she doesn’t get me (notice I say me and not it. Generally, it is a failure on my part to communicate), she will respond with “It’s a rock.” Then, I shake my head and chuckle thinking of this scene. 

I like to use props to tell stories about leadership, but not all people learn the same way. Be flexible. Use different types of ‘props’ to get your teaching point across such as: video, props, stories about your life, books or articles you have read, or sometimes just an arm around the shoulder and a quiet lesson in their ear…  Not all of your props as a leader will work with all audiences. 

Who are you communicating with and they respond to you with the proverbial “It’s a rock”?  How are you learning from this response?

There were a few topics of the 26 lessons that have struck a chord with me recently that I will share here:

Lesson #21:  Influence should be loaned and never given- It is my nature to think that my influence can change anyone and everyone.  This is just not the case.  Some folks ask, but do not want to be held accountable.  If they do not want to be held accountable after some time of mentoring, then I resever the right to call my loan, so to speak.

Lesson #22: For everything you gain, you give up something – Generally, to go up, you must give up something that makes you comfortable.  Whether that is material, associations with people, or a bad habit, to go up, we must always give up.

Lesson #12: Your biggest mistake is not asking what mistake you’re making – To get maximum attention, make a big mistake.  TO cause maximum damage, fail to admit it!  As leaders, you will make mistakes.  PLEASE don’t be afraid to admit to those mistakes.  I believe this was President Bush’s biggest weakness – an inability to admit a mistake.

So, this book is filled with 26 great leadership lessons.  I had 10 dogears, and was tough on the dogears for this book.  The score for this book is 254 pgs/ 10 dogears for a 25.4 score.  Not a must ‘read’, according to the scale, but clearly a must resource to have to refer to on a regular basis in times of need.

So, what are you reading right now?

I read this book while on vacation and it was hard to put down once I got started.  Even my mother borrowed it from me during vacation and finished it in just a couple sittings!  (She gave it back with a gift of a bookmark – Thanks, Mom!)

The title depicts the time Don Piper spent in heaven after a severe accident where he had been pronounced dead and 90 minutes later, he returned to life.  The book jumps immediately into this event and details the agonizing AND rewarding recovery process.  There were a few great takeaways for me:

1) If that’s heaven as he describes it, that IS where I want to go!

2) Prayer is powerful

3) We all have a purpose for being here at this moment.  I really only ‘highlighted’ one passage in the book.  It was a question that Don was asked by a friend: “Is it possible that God took you to heaven and brought you back for you to share what happened to you?  Don’t you realize what a powerful encouragement you can be to others?”

So, I hope that I don’t have to be in a horrible accident with life altering injuries before I realize that where I am right now, no matter what situation I face, I can be an encouragement to others.

You can, too!  Fill in the blank:  Is it possible that you were put in the situation of __________________________, so that you could be a powerful encouragement to others?

And, if you think your situation is too bad for that…read this book.  It may change your perspective.

In any event, I found the book to be filled with several development nuggets and timely quotes from other leaders that he ‘borrows’ to emphasize his points.

There were some specific questions for me that I went back to review a couple times:

1) Do I have a strategy to reach my dream?  While I have a Life Plan to outline the dream, my action on the strategy has been sputtering.  I need to remove some non-essentials (I identified 7 of them in writing.  I know there are more!) that keep me from reaching my dream.

2) Am I willing to pay the price for my dream? One of the prices to pay in achieving the dream is dealing with criticism.  This is not a strength of mine.  Just ask my wife, Chris!

3) Am I moving closer to my dream?  This question focused on believe in self.  Another area where I can grow.

So, I am sure that of the ten questions in this book, you can find 1,2, or 3 to trigger some thought in your mind and more importantly, action by you, to help you achieve your dream.

This book, like most of Maxwell’s books, was 225 pages.  I had 11 dog ears.  My new rating system will be on a ’20:1′ ratio of ‘total pages:dogears’.  My expectation for a good book would be a 20.  Anything from a 15-20 is a good book and worth the investment.  Above 20 – Go get it now!.  This book’s score is: 20.5.  Go get it…read it…take action from it…

So, what is keeping you from achieving your dream?

This is not a post about judging right or wrong or the individuals involved, but making a point.  As our Responsibilities increase (Quarterback = President), our Rights decrease.  I am not talking about the rights we have as citizens, but the rights we have to make poor judgement and put ourselves in bad situations in the eyes of those who follow us and believe in us.  What have I learned from this Ben Roethlisberger story?

1. I choose not to put myself in situations like Roethlisberger put himself in.  Aside from the allegations, we live in a world of camera phones, flip video cameras, Twitpic, etc., and our poor judgement can be broadcast, literally, in SECONDS.
2. Leadership is a full-time position.  24/7.   There is a country song titled “I don’t have to be me til Monday.”  WRONG.  When you leave your ‘office’, you are expected to behave the same way whether or not you can be seen.  This is the definition of CHARACTER
3. Some wise advice I was given early on:  “If your mother would be embarrassed to read about this action on the front page of the newspaper tomorrow, you probably should not be doing it.”

Ben Roethlisberger has made some poor decisions and put himself into a bad situation.  Whether or not he was convicted, he is the face of the Pittsburgh Steelers’ franchise.  As a leader, he must do better.   I hope that he, as an individual and leader, can recover from this and rebuild trust in the relationships he has damaged.

So, do you agree?  Do your rights DECREASE as your RESPONSIBILITIES increase?  Why or why not?